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Post by choosybeggar on Aug 25, 2010 13:47:43 GMT -5
Oh, there you are!" He
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Hescotteach still looks like Brianna, right?
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Post by dizzyjam on Aug 25, 2010 16:39:04 GMT -5
exclaims. Hescotteach shifts form and * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Not anymore. Now we get to see if Brianna is really who this new character was looking for, or if this new character only knew Hescotteach as Brianna and therefore never knew Brianna. I sort of like that the Wyrm thought our main character had kidnapped Brianna. I think we should have a good reality check exclamation from him sometime soon here. He's really got to be confused at this point. Especially if he only knew Brianna just a certain way. Did he ever know the true Brianna? Did they wyrm know him from before having seen him with the true Brianna, and the main character never knew? So many possibilities here. Let's see how he handles the confusion.
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Post by birdnerd on Aug 25, 2010 18:02:05 GMT -5
becomes his true self, a
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Post by dizzyjam on Aug 25, 2010 18:24:32 GMT -5
stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking Nerf-herder * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Stretched my own rule here, but I think words with a dash are still considered "one word", so therefore that's still only "five" words. Anyways, other than the dash I added to the last, the other dashes were already in place at this IMDB site which had the quote - www.imdb.com/title/tt0080684/quotes - but, hey, I hope we can all be okay with a Star Wars jibe whether or not we agree on the amount of words.
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Post by choosybeggar on Aug 26, 2010 0:25:00 GMT -5
with a bad hair year.
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Oh, oh! I figured it out! The wyrm's mistake, I mean. No one has to listen to this, but I think it might be a good idea. In the reality check moment, the wyrm brings forth a note left to him by his sister. It reads something like, 'Hey bro! Someone stole my bracelet today. I'll probably get my identity stolen sometime in the next few hours. If you can't find me, I suspect the main character of this story to have been the one who's done it. (Describes the main character, thereby giving a way to describe him using show not tell methods. Maybe she's been watching him for a while from behind a dimensional screen.) Oh, and mind the shop for me while I'm gone! That is, as well as you can while hunting my identity-stealer down!"
Repeat, no one has to ever use this as an idea, and it certainly isn't intended to be used verbatum. But another idea! Maybe she looks different right now, wherever she is, and if he kills/disables Hescottleach, she'll resume her right form. Then they can find her.
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Post by newburydave on Sept 1, 2010 20:28:42 GMT -5
Brian whipped out his sword. ================= Star Wars! Where's a Sith Lord when you need one? Oh wait, maybe we found one! Transdimensional swordplay anyone?
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Post by Grace Bridges on Sept 6, 2010 6:34:25 GMT -5
"You'll not leave here until
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Post by birdnerd on Sept 6, 2010 7:11:33 GMT -5
I get some real
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Post by choosybeggar on Sept 6, 2010 11:39:48 GMT -5
answers! Who are you?" He
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Post by birdnerd on Sept 6, 2010 18:13:09 GMT -5
demanded as he backed
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Post by newburydave on Sept 8, 2010 11:14:35 GMT -5
into a corner. "I should ======= Now we have to wade through the bluster and posturing of the two swords beings before they actually test each other's blades. The psychological gambits are supposed to be the most important part of real swordplay.
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Post by choosybeggar on Sept 8, 2010 12:10:39 GMT -5
like to know the same
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Woah! Okay, I just went back through some of the different 'archives' on this story. But first off, does the Wyrm/brother of Brianna have a name? I couldn't find it.
Some info I did get: he was chased out from behind the bookshop by Hescottleach, who evidently didn't know him, even though Hesc was pretending to be his sister. I really think he was hiding around, watching Brian, thinking Brian was the kidnapper. Why else would he attack him with a flaming sword? And what is the motive of Hesc, for joining Brian at that time (besides having just pried the Wyrm out of hiding)? Whatever it was, s/he must not have achieved his/her goal. And is Hescottleach a last name? That's what I assumed it to be. That's about all I have to say about the story for now.
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Post by Grace Bridges on Sept 9, 2010 1:08:29 GMT -5
," said a voice from above
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Post by choosybeggar on Sept 9, 2010 2:31:54 GMT -5
. "Brianna!" shouted (whatshisface, insert name here) as
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What IS his face? The bad/good guy, who is never named.... I guess put in, "the Wyrm," again. Oh! Maybe Brianna is arriving, and she'll fall into the arms of her wondrous brother, and say, "I'm so glad I made it back! I missed you, (Insert whatshisface's name here.)" That would be a good way to bring it out. Unless he's already got a name? I keep asking the question, and nobody has answered it.
Does the Wyrm have a name (yet)?
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Post by newburydave on Sept 9, 2010 21:06:49 GMT -5
<"Brianna!" shouted the Wyrm as> he pulled the flaming sword ============== So far the Wyrm doesn't have a name that we know. He's been alternatively: The Flaming Sword Guy, The Wyrm and now the Universal Nerd. Let's see, who did we designate to keep the Character Bible with all those pesky character details? I named Brianna and Hescotleach (first name) so it's somebody else's turn. Now is this sudden appearance of the Real Brianna a case of Deux Ex Machina? Hmmmm, It strikes me that that construction that we just made ". . . shouted the Wyrm as he pulled the flaming sword. . ." borders on a "Said Bookism" aka "A Tom Swiftie". Not good, not good at all!
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