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Post by isabeau on Jan 5, 2010 16:21:38 GMT -5
One of the prime rules of writing. I think it is easier to do in extreme situations, such as in the face of an overwhelming emotion like rage. But how would you go about expressing that a character is experiencing something like mild surprise, without saying so? Mild emotions don't always show on someone's face, especially if the characters aren't emotionally expressive to begin with. I suppose the character could lift an eyebrow, but really, only Mr. Spock can get away with that on a regular basis.
I'm finding it a challenge. What do you guys do?
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Post by Jeff Gerke on Jan 5, 2010 22:39:19 GMT -5
That's where your creative genius can flourish. If you really want a challenge, go all Charlie Chaplin and force your character to express surprise (or whatever else) without words at all. Purely through action and reaction.
You can do it!
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Post by beckyminor on Jan 5, 2010 23:05:13 GMT -5
In animation history class, among others, people often raved about Tinkerbell (in the original Disney Peter Pan...not any of this newer rehashing where she talks.) Why? Because the subtlety of her emotions came through only in pantomime. Now, granted, that's cartoon emotion, so it's a little extreme, but Jeff has made the point...if you can get emotion across without "telling," you win.
As for mild surprise, I guess a lot of how you convey it has to do with whether the surprisee wants to display it. Does, he clear his throat, perhaps? Blink with a narrow of the eyes? Maybe those are too strong a reaction...
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Post by Jeff Gerke on Jan 5, 2010 23:53:59 GMT -5
A double-take is a classic sign of surprise. Failing to follow through with sequences (like stepping through a door or taking a bite of a sandwich) is another technique. There are a million.
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Post by isabeau on Jan 6, 2010 21:07:31 GMT -5
That's where your creative genius can flourish. If you really want a challenge, go all Charlie Chaplin and force your character to express surprise (or whatever else) without words at all. Purely through action and reaction. You can do it! Yes, exactly, the goal is to do it without telling. When you say "without words" do you mean dialogue (I don't want to assume)? Tinkerbell is a great example. My challenge is that a number of particular facial expressions can express a variety of mild emotions, and I want to make sure the reader knows which one I mean without telling. I think I need to set it aside and come back to it later with a fresh eye.
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Post by Jeff Gerke on Jan 7, 2010 8:44:48 GMT -5
I do mean without words, though that might be just for an exercise. If in real life the person would say something to express surprise, you can have your character do so in the book.
Just watch for what I call telling in quotation marks: "My, I am suprised! I did not expect to see you here because Jimmy told me that you were reliving your childhood in Pasadena and would not be home until 9 p.m. on Sunday after the second church service at First Baptist."
If you give just as much telling information but try to get away with it by making someone say it out loud, it's still telling. Putting quotes around it doesn't automatically convert it from telling to showing, in other wordds.
Be careful with facial expressions too because they might be be too obscure unless you "help the reader along: "He raised his eyebrow in surprise" or "He raised his eyebrow as if to say, 'My, I am suprised! I did not expect to see you here because Jimmy told me that you were reliving your childhood in Pasadena and would not be home until 9 p.m. on Sunday after the second church service at First Baptist.'"
;D
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Post by Grace Bridges on Jan 8, 2010 1:27:23 GMT -5
I'm not sure the "mild" is necessary. We're taught that modifiers such as slightly, really, somewhat and suchlike in fact weaken the strength of our expression. I'm quite a fan of that school of thought, and if it was me, I'd think hard about whether you really want "mild" to be in there at all.
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Post by isabeau on Jan 8, 2010 9:49:03 GMT -5
I do mean without words, though that might be just for an exercise. If in real life the person would say something to express surprise, you can have your character do so in the book. Just watch for what I call telling in quotation marks: "My, I am suprised! I did not expect to see you here because Jimmy told me that you were reliving your childhood in Pasadena and would not be home until 9 p.m. on Sunday after the second church service at First Baptist." Yes, that is rather like cheating. LOL My characters don't do that, but I have said to someone (at church no less), "Wow, I am surprised to see you here today! I didn't think you would be back..." Maybe I should write a story about mimes. Grace, I think you may have misunderstood my post. I'm talking about finding ways of expressing subtle (mild) emotions in characters, not using the word "mild" in the text of the novel.
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Post by Grace Bridges on Jan 8, 2010 23:03:15 GMT -5
lol no one could ever call me subtle, as those who know me will tell you! So I avoid subtlety in my writing as well. Just an opinion, nothin' more.
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catofninetales
Junior Member
People are the only thing you can take with you to heaven.
Posts: 66
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Post by catofninetales on Mar 2, 2010 17:20:08 GMT -5
isabeau, perhaps the clearest way to express it would be through the overall context of the scene. Whatever has surprised your character, it will modify his/her course of actions, such as how seriously they take the rest of the conversation, how they choose to answer from then on, whether they develop fidgets or are distracted staring out the window, pursuing the point that surprised them. Sometimes, thinking large, broad strokes is the surest way to get the writing process off the small-facial-expression merry-go-round. The other thing to consider is POV. If you're writing from behind the eyes of the mildly surprised person, you have a bit more range in using their actual thoughts. If from another POV, the only thing to really know is whether the POV character would even notice the reaction. You can still use subtle cues to get the point across to the reader, if the right ones present themselves. But: is the point necessary to getting to the final crisis? is this particular character trait a required revelation right now? does this reaction change the story to an extent that it would suffer if you didn't include it? You can save yourself a ton of headaches by only doing what you have to. I believe in lazy writing... To clarify Grace's idea, the principle of using "mild" to tell us about it extends to the principle of using "mild" cues to show us in the story. Unless there's a solid reason for subtlety, you can save yourself time and struggle by choosing Surprise or Not-Surprise. That would be my take on it, anyway. Hope that gives some fun food for thought. Take what works for you and leave the rest.
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Post by newburydave on Mar 10, 2010 21:07:05 GMT -5
From another viewpoint maybe mild isn't what you're really after. I assume that the reason you introduce "mild emotions" is that these emotions influence or drive some kind of action to move the plot along.
It's my experience that mild emotions don't motivate actions.
When contrasting surprise to anger I suppose the adjectives "stong" and "mild" come to mind. IMHO those aren't the correct categories. Surprise can be a very powerful motivator, even though it isn't rage or fury.
I guess my operative question is "how do you show surprise when it moves you to act?" That's probably what your POV or character would do too.
I know surprise has made me do some pretty radical things.
Write on, write true.
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Post by waldenwriter on Mar 18, 2010 22:20:45 GMT -5
My fellow members in the Creative Writing Workshop club keep telling me to show more in my work. It is hard for me to do so because...well, I don't know exactly. I guess it's because of my extreme attention to detail, I feel like I have to tell everything. I try to show more, but it's difficult because it's not the way I naturally write.
I agree with you, isabeau, it's easier to show in extreme situations. I guess the best I can say is what my Creative Writing class teacher said: If you really know your character, you'll know how he or she will react to any situation. Of course, some stories are more plot-driven than character-driven, but I think that idea applies to both.
I like the Tinkerbell example, although she does talk now (in the Disney Fairies movies). She does do a good job showing emotion in the old movies she's in without words.
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Post by isabeau on Apr 22, 2010 15:06:53 GMT -5
Thank you for your suggestions. I regret I haven't been very active recently. I've had to deal with some unsettling life changes over the past few months, and my focus has been elsewhere. But I appreciate all your input.
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Post by Spokane Flyboy on Apr 23, 2010 22:34:28 GMT -5
Generally, if an emotion is mild, dialogue is enough as the expressions don't often get noticed. I roleplayed a character who was a violent, and rather sadistic, sociopath. However, the only time he really showed much emotion was in fits of rage when things didn't go his way, though he also had a sarcastic side that revealed itself when he was torturing some poor soul. Otherwise, his emotions were mild if existent at all. It seemed most effective to not mention his body-language at all as he really didn't have any, and I typically gave a mention on tone of his voice if I felt the other player might view it as an emotional response.
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Post by newburydave on Apr 27, 2010 19:48:42 GMT -5
It seems to me that dialog would be a good choice for truly mild emotional reactions. Or subtle facial expressions such as raised eyebrows.
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